i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize