Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
My legs feel like baby dolphins
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
