Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
