You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
