She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
