I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize
