hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
