she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
