she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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