Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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