just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
