Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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