Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
you had me at cake vodka
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize