better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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