Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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