; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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