I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
The ass gains better be worth it
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