we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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