before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
