rhymes with "ouble enetration"
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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