I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
should my penis look like a turkey
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
