just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
