OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
