You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
