Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
