Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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