god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize