She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
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