Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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