You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
