return my video game
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
