you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
