Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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