god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
