I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
