so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
