new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
This is the high leading the old right now
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
