just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Randomize
