I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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