my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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