5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
sick fucks of a feather flock together
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
