why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
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