I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
youre lurking in front of me
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
