i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
