Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
