bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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