what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize