Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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