Dual....:-)
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
