That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
