No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
